Environmental Factors

Once I hit Texas my depression became less and less. As the days wore on and the sunshine permeated the pain and my longtime friendship nourished, nurtured and fed my belly lovely protein, I became myself again.

I asked B. to get a gas/co detector. It stays at 33/50 in my room. I believe that I have been getting poisoned, the stuff in 'natural' gas isn't so natural. Methane being one of its components. We have a gas leak and are on a list to get it fixed. The neighbors have a gas leak. Its a leaky neighborhood.

I need to embark on a detox and be sure to leave the house daily, I lost weight in the past month, which serves me.

Goals: Detox and get a trainer.

I have been a suffering flower the past month, in my journal, I rate the depression. Going back over my writing I am floored by how high it gets and how low I have felt.

Right now I am overwhelmed and scurrying about and exhausted, so almost even keel for me.

Need to fire psychiatrist and acquire new one.

Reading 'The Outlander'. J. gave it to me when I got there, after I got sucked in, it came to be known that she gave it to me to help me through this phase. Its such a touching thing, I am getting teary just thinking about it. She is not prone to sentimentality and her amazing gift of this book says so many things. She knows me, she knows how to reach me, she loves me and etc etc etc.

Going to find out if I got approved yet for surgery. Have/had food poisoning, drank the water in Texas and it is so weird to not be able to purge. Vomiting has its place. Just like depression, it tells you something isn't right.

Am I the canary in the coal mine? Does listening to Ziggy Stardust on repeat for a long time make me odder?

This and other questions answered and vice versa on the next episode of Rose and the SAD and the joyful.